Rotten Dark Confession

Rotten Dark Confession
Okay fine… I feel down. I feel bad. Perhaps I should write…

I feel little
I feel small
I feel sore, pain, and hurt
Sometimes I think I’m already dead
Trying to hurt myself even more…
You just don’t understands
No one does
I feel like I don’t have everything to compete with other
I don’t care about everything that happens around;
That’s makes me being a dumbest girl in earth
I just realized that I am a biggest problem to myself
To which I can’t solve it; right!
When it comes to be together in group
I can go with the flow;
I force myself to go with it
Luckily I am always in their circle
Especially when I wanted to;
Too bad it makes me hurt sometimes
To which I disagree on some attitudes
Either towards me or to other people
It makes me hurt and sore so badly
I wish it to end
I tried not to mind others
But I feel bad to myself
I feel sorry
Sometimes I feel like I had lost everything
When everyone wants to be pretty
Let me be the ugliest one
It’s not that I wished to be
But I know I’m not at my best
I don’t have any good features
Not any talented or brainy
And I become worst when I meet any new person
Individually and in person
Because I know I am not better
I know I am not as great as anyone
I can’t remember things well
Too bad I can’t forget any bad memories and experiences
I hate it when people that I like
Is being apart… and lost forever
They found their new friends or love
Sooner or later I’m sure I’ll be forgotten
While everyone is forgetting me
I think it’s good for me to step behind before it happen
Life sucks; that’s my opinion
Waiting for it to change
Too bad it become worst than I thought
I ban on people’s attitudes
I’m not perfect! So to everyone!
I sick at everything!
Love, life, friendships, marriage, relationships, trust
I feel hopeless!
I feel ugly!
Not just bout physical thingy but in almost EVERYTHING!
I wonder;
Is it only me who feel that way!?
Is it only me to feel sore about life 24/7?
Why does it always have to be me!?
Sometimes I know I just ruin everything on!
I don’t meant to do that
But I can’t it
Perhaps these really need an end
A perfect end so everything goes better
I wish I never been here
With life, sore and pains
It’s just unfair!
Friends says that I changed
Too bad I am always being myself
I unleashed my inner self
Being free and hard
Makes me grow a lil’stronger

-I don’t know what am I thinking; but I guess this writing helps!-

-Beck here; the bandagedknee
And yours; Broken Medusa-